Simon's Newest Party Trick
by damdagedgoodsXhumanfaliure
Summary: Dan and the dead. Dan and Simon OTP. Dan is a ghost fucker Damaged Goods


Hey there, you might remember me. I'm Dan Dyer, you know, the kid who talks to dead people. Dead spooky huh? I know, I was spooked at first but then , on my twelfth birthday, I met Si. Best birthday present ever. It's been a few years since then though. This year he gave me an even better birthday present. Do you remember how Si has certain tricks? Ya know, like the thing with the locks and stuff, and the telekinesis, that sort of stuff. Most ghosts can't do much but, like I've said before, he's been around a while, he's learnt a thing or two. But like, I mean, he learns these tricks so randomly, so he gave me a surprise didn't he? One of his special talents and I must say its the best so far. You see it's quite odd really, Si's quite an old fashioned guy, I never would've expected this sort of thing from him but I'm certainly not complaining.

So there I was, sitting around waiting for midnight for all the spooky happenings to begin and Si appears. Normally he's with someone, it was odd. Maybe the dead just decided to chill for a night; that or my waiting list was overflowing and Si wanted my opinion on who should come next. Hopefully it was the first, I really wanted a break.

"Hello Daniel, I realise we have numerous clients but I've decided that you need a break, after all, it IS your birthday" Simon greeted.

"Really? Thanks Si" I was grateful for the break but it was odd, he never gave me a break before, especially when things were busy.

So I thought that was pretty weird.

Remember how I was saying he can do these tricks? Well for my sixteenth he decided to show me his newest party trick and then I guess we had a whole different type of birthday party, way better than the cake and party games you had when you were a kid. So, like I said, Si learns these tricks randomly, without me even knowing, I guess maybe he does it in the little time I have to sleep. Anyway, he recently gained the ability to physically interact with the world of the living. I mean he's been close with messing with locks and pulling down bullies trousers but I mean that, if he wants, he could pick up a lamp and throw it across the room or could punch you in the face and you'd feel it. Not just a cold sensation but a full blown punch as though a living human had done it. Pretty useful skill right? Well, luckily for me Si decided to test it out on me in a much more interesting way...

Si's got a grin on his face, I reckon he's planning something, I don't know whether to be excited or worried. I guess there's a mix of both. That's when he steps closer.

"Daniel, I'd like to show you something."

What's he on about? He lifts his arms up and touches my face. I can feel it there, I can feel fingers and cold, icy flesh and its like he's living. It's so surreal but that's not even the half of it all.

"I just want you to relax, Daniel. It's time for your present." He speaks slowly, mischievously. What's he up to? What does he mean present? All the words he's saying are telling me to just chill but I can't help but think I should be more worried about what's going to happen. And then he kisses me. He leans in and his icy lips touch mine. I'm shocked, obviously. It's weird, a ghost kissing you and you, thinking you're into girls with actual flesh and blood but suddenly you might just be into the 300+ year old MALE ghost that you thought wouldn't dare kiss someone before marriage, let alone a dude and you're trying to get your head around it but it's just too confusing, too surreal. I take longer than I probably ought to've to kiss back. I realise I had reason for a delay but it probably took a lot of guts for Si to throw himself out there. Whatever, that doesn't matter. What matters is I'm suddenly having a make out session with a gay ghost and then my pants start to tighten and I realise how into this kiss I really am. Again, it's odd, Si's so old fashioned it's weird but I'm certainly not gonna object to any of it especially when he starts rubbing my crotch with those skeletal fingers of his. I let out a moan and I hope to god my parents don't hear. Hearing me talking to "myself" is bad enough. Hearing me getting felt up by a ghost and that's when things REALLY start to get weird. Si smirks. Maybe it was all an act, the stuck up aristocrat who can't ever have a good time. Maybe the real him is this right now, smirking at my moans and touching and kissing me. I mean, he's been around long enough to learn a thing or two, he could've learned how to hide it and he's obviously learned how to do a damned good job at pleasing a guy. I'm not entirely sure when it happened but he'd removed my clothes, my jeans are at the bottom of my ankles and he's not just palming at my crotch but he's touching me and how I didn't notice his chilling touch is a mystery to me but I can't focus on that right now. All I can focus on is the pleasure it gives me as he moves his hand at a steady pace along my hard cock and the contrast between the cold and the hot making it feel so much better than any time I've ever done this to myself. I'm reaching my edge and I warn Si.

"Si, I-I'm gonna-" I whisper but don't finish my sentence. Instead moan as quietly as I could make myself and came over Si's hand. Of course, him being a ghost it went straight through him, I didn't care though, I'd clean that up later. What was important is I'd found out a bunch of stuff about me and Si I guess.

"Did you like your present?" Si asked. Is he serious? I imagine my expression and the cum stain on the floor should've been sufficient evidence for him. I answered anyway

"Yea, Si. Best. Birthday. Ever." I chuckled.

So that was the story, weird right? I guess it was weird for me atleast. Not so weird anymore though. i guess Im just used to it. I should go, Si's waiting for me. I've been Dan Dyer, the kid who talks to dead people and I guess every so often gets off over them but let's keep that between you and me eh? See ya! *wink*


End file.
